Private Beach Blues
by ginchy-amanda
Summary: Luke and Mara try to vacation.  It doesn't work out so well.  Just Luke and Mara fun and fluff.


**Title:** Private Beach Blues  
><strong>Author:<strong> ginchy  
><strong>Timeline:<strong> Post Union  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I don't own these characters, but I certainly love them.  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Luke and Mara, those wacky perpetual newlyweds.  
><strong>Notes: <strong>Had a bad day. Wanted fluff to cheer me up. Pulled this unfinished TF.N SJRS quote challenge off the hard drive and went to work. The challenge had been for Luke and Mara to use each other's quotes. The quotes used are, "_Everything's better with a Jedi around."_ and _"Master Skywalker, are you becoming a romantic?"_ This has not been beta'd and the ending was written very quickly, so I apologize for any mistakes. **Jade_Pilot** and **JediMara77** did help me to shape the idea. Thanks ladies!

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_**Private Beach Blues**_

"Skywalker," Mara Jade Skywalker growled through clenched teeth as she and her husband disembarked their ship, the _Jade Sabre_. "This place is a tourist trap. I thought it was supposed to be a _private_ beach."

The aforementioned Skywalker, Luke, gave his wife a sideway glance and tiny smile. "Our cottage is on a private beach, Mara. The entire island, however, is inhabited."

"Cute. I think 'overpopulated' is a better descriptor." Mara eyed the sight-seers from every species imaginable as they waddled by in loud shirts and strange hats in varying loud shades. "And I don't remember you mentioning that, my love," she said, using the term of endearment sarcastically as she deflected curious looks from the passing crowds. "Are you covering us with a Force disguise?"

Luke templed his fingers in front of him and gave her another maddening smile. "No, because isn't that technically unnecessary use-"

"Don't start with me," Mara said, but a flicker of good humor was in her eyes. "And it's not unnecessary, unless you want your admirers flocking to our private beach with us."

"_My_ admirers?" Luke asked, gesturing to two Devaronian males that were paying a little too much attention to Mara.

As she turned to look they suddenly turned towards the beach and wandered off. Mara gave a look to her husband. "Did you-"

"Deflect their interest and cover us with a Force disguise?" Luke asked. "You bet."

"Now you're being cute," Mara said, but took his hand in hers and led him forward as he hitched their bag on his shoulder. "Let's find the rental office so we can get out of this crowd and onto the private beach you promised me."

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"Apparently there's a sea monster here," Mara said, as she perused the rental office while Luke signed their cover names into the register. "The Ick-En-Barf Monster," she read, looking at a blurry holo image of something that might have resembled a sea monster or a floating tree branch.

"Ick-En-Barf," Luke repeated with a chuckle. "Because you regurgitate in fright when you see it?"

"Actually," the realtor behind the desk cut in, "it's pronounced Ick-on-bare-ef."

"Right," Mara said after a beat.

"Is it a real serpent or a local legend?" Luke asked absently, submitting his thumb print for their room security.

Mara gave him a not-so-subtle Force nudge and he rolled his eyes at her playfully. "Also, the private beach you promised-"

"Your cottage is located on the bluff, and is the most secluded point of the island," the realtor promised, flinching under Mara's narrowed gaze. "If you could just place your thumb here, Mistress Yars… Are you two here celebrating an anniversary?"

"Something like that," Mara answered coolly, placing her own thumb on the machine.

"Uh, yes, well, I hope you enjoy your stay."

"As long as we avoid Old Barfy, we'll be fine," Mara said.

"Icken_barraf _is somewhat of a celebrity around here," the realtor said, defensively. "He's often sighted by tourists such as you."

"I'm sure it would be the thrill of my life," Mara muttered.

Luke cleared his throat to avoid laughing and finished the niceties with the realtor before they left the office and again melded into the crowd of tourists. As they walked further up the boardwalk and off onto the private path towards the cottage, the crowds lessened as promised, until the beach became empty in front of the picturesque cabin. Luke gave her a look, grinning when she rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, Skywalker," she said, squeezing around him and into the door. "I'm just happy to see the empty stretch of beach."

"Me too, my love," he said, throwing their bag onto the couch and grabbing her up into his arms. "After all, I did promise you a vacation on a private beach once you finished your training and became a Master."

"Well, you did keep up your end of the bargain." She gave him a quick kiss and wormed out of his arms. "But enough of this. Get your pants off and get your butt on that beach, Skywalker."

Luke popped the button on his trousers, but sputtered as Mara's shirt landed on his face. He pulled it off and looked at her, digging through their travel bag for her bathing suit. "Going out like that, Jade?" he asked, admiring her.

She flashed him a smirk. "I'm game if you are…"

"You know I don't skinny-dip," Luke said, taking the pair of swim trunks she held out for him.

Mara let out a huff of laughter. "Since when?" she asked, using their bond to subtly remind him of a certain evening on their honeymoon.

"Since we're surrounded by tourists," he answered, putting on his trunks as Mara located her bathing suit.

"So you admit it!" Mara groused, before giving him a playful smirk. "Barf monsters and tourists—I'm planning the next vacation, Farmboy."

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Mara placed the cap back on her bottle of sun-lotion and glared at Luke, lying on the blanket beside of her, all golden muscle with no need for sun protection. She wiped the excess lotion from her hand onto his chest anyway, shrieking in a most un-Mara-like way when he grabbed her and pulled her down onto him for a kiss.

"What about the tourists?" Mara murmured, pulling away from the kiss to look into his eyes, such a clear blue in the light of the sun.

"I don't sense any tourists nearby." He ran his hands over her back, slick from the lotion. He didn't give her time to respond, kissing her again as the cool wind from the water off the ocean drifted over them.

Mara pulled back from his lips when a slight fission of energy moved through the Force. She stiffened in his arms before resting her forehead against his for a moment. "Tourists."

"Children," he corrected, sitting up after she climbed off of him. "And here they come now."

Loud shouts and happy screams came over the edge of the bluff before they saw the kids. The screaming immediately stopped when the children noticed them.

"Maybe they'll go back from where they came," Luke whispered.

After a moment of silence the children resumed their chatter and walked toward Luke and Mara. "Or maybe they'll come over to visit," Mara muttered back out of the corner of her mouth.

"Who're you?" The tallest child in the group, seemingly the leader, asked in Basic as the crowd stopped in front of Luke and Mara.

"Is that any way to speak to your elders?" Mara gave the kids a pointed look.

A few of the kids shuffled their feet in the sand and looked embarrassed. One little girl, a young Twi'lek, twisted at her head-tails. "We're sorry, ma'am. We didn't know you were elderly."

Luke choked off a laugh, trying to disguise it with a cough as Mara's mouth pursed. "I'm Luke and this is Mara," he said to the kids. "We're here on vacation."

"We can show you around!"

"Yeah! We all live here! My name is Ela and that's Jek and Cobb and Aleri…" Ela, the little Twi'lek, kept naming children until the kids started chattering over and amongst themselves, trying to decide the best sites to show the vacationers on the beach.

"They might like Big Rock," Ela said when the voices trailed off.

"Oh?" Luke gave a side-glance to Mara. "What's Big Rock?"

The tall boy gave Luke a strange look. "It's a big rock."

"Of course." Mara nudged Luke in the ribs. "He didn't hear you correctly, being elderly."

"How old are you?" Ela danced around the couple and landed on her bottom on their blanket. "75?"

This time both Luke and Mara coughed to cover their laughs. "Maybe him," Mara said, pointing at Luke.

Ela studied them both. "Nu-uh. He can't be 75. Cause he has this." She pushed two figures at her chin, as if trying to make a dimple.

"Yeah, only Mara's 75." Luke couldn't help but grin at his wife's eye roll.

"All right, kids." Mara stood up and brushed sand from her legs. "If you don't mind, Luke and I are on vacation…"

The kids didn't seem to get the hint. "You wanna play shockball?" Jek asked.

"No." Mara started walking toward the water, and looked back in dismay as she noticed the kids following her. "Don't you have somewhere else to be?"

"No," the kids grinned, answering in unison.

"Dear Force, save me," Mara muttered. She turned her back on the ocean. "Okay, kids. Look, I'm here on vacation. I'm not a baby-sitter. Go on back to your parents."

Several little mouths hung open and Ela let out a scream.

"For Force sakes, I wasn't that harsh-"

"Miss Mara, look out!" Ela screeched, pointing behind Mara. "It's Icken_barraf!"_

Mara couldn't help but notice that Ela placed the correct emphasis on the name of the creature. She turned and held her arms out to shield the kids behind her. She looked up at the towering creature in the water and sighed. "Barfy," she muttered. "Great."

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"Get back." Her voice was harsh this time as she spoke to the kids. The sea monster towered above them, covering them with its shadow. It was green and scaly and didn't look very friendly, with giant teeth poking out of its long snout.

"Aw, we ain't scared of it!"

"I mean it, get back," Mara said, just as the monster opened its mouth and roared. The kids screamed and scattered up the beach. She turned to watch them retreat and saw Luke trying to urge them up to the house. They shook their heads and stood only partially hidden by a sand dune. "What the hell are we going to do about this thing?"

"Here." He tossed her lightsaber to her, and she noticed his in his hand. "Where the—Skywalker, did you have that in your bathing suit?" She paused a beat. "Never mind, I don't want to know."

"Cute."

She backed up out of the creature's long shadow and stood next to him. "It's not really doing anything. And my stomach contents are still in place."

The creature roared again, drowning out Mara's words. It started moving toward the beach, water and sea foam splashing over Luke and Mara.

"What?" Luke wiped the water from his eyes and lit his saber as the creature came closer.

"I said—Ela, Jek! No!"

The flash from a holocam seemed to draw the monster's attention. Jek was standing in front of the dune, Ela right next to him as they took a holograph of the beast.

"Wizard!" Jek's word trailed off in a scream as the monster left the water and ignored Luke and Mara, heading for the children. He and Ela ran in opposite directions.

"Damn kids!" Mara swore, but as they faced the monster the Force bond tightened and coalesced between the two of them, merging their minds to ready for battle. Ickenbarraf swept out one long arm, almost catching Ela. Mara's saber was instantly ignited and she swung, lashing at the serpent's arm.

"Cool! Jedi!" The kids cheered from behind the dune, only to run back in fear when the monster roared in anger.

"Get back," Luke told them, and Mara could feel the Jedi suggestion in his voice. The kids moved, but not far.

"I'm not sure I actually wounded him," Mara said, running past Luke to face the monster on a new front as it made a hairpin turn, more interested in the Jedi than the children.

"I can't feel anything from it in the Force." Luke held his saber aloft but Ickenbarraf just continued to roar. "What do we do about it?"

"You're the one with more experience. Didn't you once fight a dragon while walking barefoot over a bed of lava?"

"I wasn't barefoot." Luke backed up as Ickenbarraf stepped forward.

"What do you want me to do, Skywalker? Shoo it back into the water?"

"Jek? Are you up here? Jek… WHAT THE STANG?"

Luke and Mara turned in unison as a voice came from the opposite direction of the monster. A human woman, obviously Jek's mother, screamed as she saw the creature. "Jek, come here now!"

"Mom!" Jek didn't move as the monster turned and eyed his mother. "Mom!" he screamed as Ickenbarraf advanced on her.

But the Jedi were on the move, Luke dashing in front of the monster to shield Jek's mother, and Mara reaching out with the Force, grabbing the monster's tail. It roared when caught, and struggled, but Luke lent his strength in the Force and together they toppled the creature into the sand.

"Oh my… Jek!" The children ran toward Jek's mother, all crowding around her, trying to tell her what had happened.

"It almost ate me!" Little Ela was in a frenzy, dancing around, head-tails flying.

Mara rolled her eyes, but couldn't stop a half-smile from quirking up her lip. She and Luke stood cautiously over the monster, waiting to see if it would strike again.

"Is it dead?"

The Jedi ignored the children behind them as they moved even closer. "It doesn't appear to be breathing," Luke said. "And I still don't feel anything in the Force."

"I think you're right." Mara stooped next to the creature, looking at the wound she had inflicted with her lightsaber. "Look at this," she said to her husband. She reached out with the saber's hilt and moved a piece of dangling skin. "You've got to be shaviting me."

The kids gasped at the curse word and Mara rolled her eyes.

"Is that…" Luke trailed off, looking at the smoking remains of the beast. "No wonder I didn't feel it in the Force."

The kids crowded around them just as a spark came out of the monster's arm. Luke told them to move back again.

"But Mr and Mrs. Jedi, is the monster a droid?"

"Yes," Mara answered. "And I know just whose droid it is."

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After extreme thanks from Jek's mother, Luke and Mara left the children in her care, with the condition that they stay away from the droid sea monster. They weren't sure when, or if, it might reactivate.

They stopped back in the house and packed, changing their clothes. "Seriously, Skywalker," Mara said. "Next time, I'm planning the vacation."

"You'll get no argument from me," he agreed. "This one was almost enough to make me barf."

Mara rolled her eyes again, but had a half-smile on her face as she did.

Their last stop was back to the rental office. The realtor looked startled to see them. "Mister and Mistress Yars, how can I help you?" He looked nervous. Sweating.

Luke looked at the Ickenbarraf_ mer_chandise this time as Mara spoke. "We found something of yours on the beach."

"Ah, you did?"

"Hm. Something very dangerous."

The realtor swallowed hard.

"Look out the window," Mara said. "Go on."

Shakily, the little man stood up and looked out. He turned back around. "How did you-"

"Simple," Mara said, patting the man's cheek as she passed him. "Everything's better with a Jedi around. Now, doesn't that make you just want to barf?"

The realtor looked out again at the head of his monster, sparking on the porch, drawing a crowd.

"You're lucky Ickenbarraf didn't kill anyone," Luke said, deliberately using an over pronunciation of the creature's name.

"It couldn't," the man responded faintly. "I only controlled it to follow people, splash or roar."

Mara rolled her eyes. "All for the tourist dollar." She picked up a tee-shirt that read I SAW Ickenbarraf AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEE-SHIRT. "What do you think, Skywalker? Is it me?" She held it up to her chest.

"Skywalker?" The realtor looked ready to faint. "Oh, dear."

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Mara programmed coordinates into the _Sabre_ and made the jump to lightspeed. After setting the auto pilot she and Luke removed their crash webbing and headed further into the ship. Luke detoured into the galley and Mara headed for their room, changing into something a little more comfortable. After dealing with the realtor and screaming kids, she needed a drink.

She turned around when Luke came through the door, and raised an eyebrow at the colorful drinks with tiny umbrellas that he held. "Where did you get tiny umbrellas?"

"Around. Like the shirt on you." His eyes tracked over the tourist tee, clinging to her chest and hitting her only mid-thigh. "That's the best Ickenbarraf has ever looked."

Mara shook her head, but couldn't stop a grin from spreading across her face. "Give me that." She took one of the drinks and sipped. "Not bad." She pulled her umbrella out and stuck it behind her ear. She looked around the room and sighed. "It's not a private beach."

"I'm sorry the trip got ruined, Mara." Luke put his drink down and reached out to finger the ornament in her hair. "It really looked like a nice place on the HoloNet."

"Live and learn," Mara said, wrapping her arms around his waist. "And some of us have learned a lot, ancient as we are." She shook her head. "No kids any time soon, Skywalker."

"Even you have to admit they were pretty cute."

Mara raised her eyebrow.

"…or not. Anyway, where are we off to?"

Mara grinned. "Some place with a private beach." She kissed his youthful chin dimple. "And no sea monsters."

"Smart plan."

"I think so," Mara whispered, running her hands up under his shirt to caress his back. She pressed up on her toes to capture his lips in a kiss, teasing it out until he groaned into her mouth. She pulled back and murmured against his mouth. "We'll sit on the beach and drink our ridiculous drinks and… maybe I'll let you put your arm around me."

Luke chuckled lowly. "_Maybe_. Master Jade-Skywalker, are you becoming a romantic?"

Mara kissed his lips once more and leaned back to eye him with the devilish look she knew he loved. "Please, Luke," she said, "don't make me barf."


End file.
